Chiggity /check Yo' Self

What the hell is this crap, yo I thought this was ended,
Well guess what lucky you, Visitant Status Extended.
Now first of all SAM with your sword you drop beats,
But when it comes to this rap game all you taste is defeats.

You want to know our differences and I won't make you beg,
You've got a Third Eye, while I've got a third leg.
Yeah you are sure tough when you are kicking bird tooshy,
Oh wait that's a miss, miss, miss, aww ***eat some sushi.

Come stepping to me son you musta been drunk,
Cuz see I gots the rhythm and I gots the funk.
You better run now lest your friends ask you why,
You pulled a Tom Cruise and became the Last Samurai.

Now onto the next little issue at hand,
Seems there is a monk getting fresh in the stands.

Now we all know that Monks are big strong and tough,
But the HP they have isn't nearly enough.
You talk mad noise about Dancer and you attempt to slam us,
But then you eat up my TP with my Waltz in Dynamis.

Like Batman a monk is only as good as his belt,
And WTF is up with your AF and the bright orange felt?
Yeah you punch stuff and kick stuff and that's really cool,
But you need to go back to Tibet and go back to Monk school.

See what you both fail to realize is that this rap game's my home,
And if there is one thing I will not stand for that is... one sec, zone.
Now I gotta wrap up cuz your Visitant status is spent,
I'm a mother fvckin' HN-MC and I drop Mad Beats(R/EX) ONE HUNDRED PERCENT!

Samurai?! HAH, you've had your time,
Calling you a Dealer is simply a crime,
I know you're really sad SAM has had it's run,
But knowing your skill, you prolly rock a Hagun.

Now listen little man whilst I make it simple,
SAM is as wanted as a really painful pimple.
Now look at me, go-on take it in!
Missing a bard at a fight is simply a sin.

Whilst your dreamin' about numbers flyin' from a skill,
I'm singing a ***' march and providing the thrill,
Low man or alliance, anywhere I'll shine,
But a poor little samurai? I'll Decline.

You know, that be great. Good for you. /Attack.
Your skill in playa hatin' is simply slash 'n hack.
Let's not forget without abilities you're sunk.
Oh you linked a few while you solo? Too bad, punk.

Let's not forget without Mages you'd be dead.
This Red can be healing and debuffin'. 'Nuff said.
Oh, you need a haste? Your build ain't enough?
Aw, I really feel for you. That sounds rough.

Now your health is turning red. Think your job is still fly?
It's up to me if you will live, I love to see you cry.
Just remember when you compare your stupid little stats
That in every good party, a Red's always got your back.

I came a little.

Once again I find my hearing affronted by this Bard,
Will someone please knock some sense into this tard?
Your rapping was bad and now it's really gone south,
Stick to blowing as that's the only skill you have with your mouth.

When I read your last verse I thought God help me lady,
I don't know how but you're worse than chicka-chicka Slim Shady.
If I were you I would quit while you're ahead,
Cuz when I finish with you Reraise won't keep you from being dead.

Oh ***son what's this? A Red Mage come to holler?
Maybe if you'd studied more you'd be as good as a Scholar.
See your pimp hat was the only good part of the deal,
But now that ***is gone, you ain't a Red Mage, you're Teal

Don't get too upset though cuz I'll level RDM soon,
So it can be my *** sub when I solo Dragoon.
See that's all that you are now and I know that must hurt,
To see your legacy flushed down as a White Mage uses Convert.

But hey thanks for coming out, I like that you're tryin'
Now get back to the Airship and get your *** flyin.
Cuz in your future I see you'll be having some fun,
Killin rabbits in Ronfy since your SCH's level one.

Yo- I go next, put ya gil away
Cuz when I come to play I'm ninja lottin drops all day
Not to be confused with the botter or RMT
I get the drops for free and then insult ya family

Equally as rude on the AH and bazaar,
If ya overbid, yer money's gone, dont even try, you wont get far
cuz my blacklist's gettin longer every day
Whats that you say?
Oh thats right I didnt hear you cuz im a thousand malms away

Long story short, you just got jacked and theres nothin u can do
Whether dnc mnk sam or blu youre all too weak its sad but true
So call a GM and give him your point of view
But like the rest of us, all he's gonna do is laugh at you!

this reminds me of

I was about to catch some Z's because of the hour,
But then I saw Miradj wants a taste of the power.
First things first I am changing your name,
"Spoonfull of Mayo" will be your title for this game.

Cuz like the name implies your rap taste is so bad,
And no one would ever eat you that really so sad.
Well Spoonfull, you talk big and you're acting all rude,
But you just come off as a wankster with a bad 'tude.

You step up to the plate, and took a shot at bat,
But just like the Yankees you ain't too good at that.
You thought you were better but you were deceived,
And the reason is that-
Your message could not be received.
Your message could not be received.
Your message could not be received.

That was good o_o Nostalgia at the same time too

someone got served in this thread... idk who .. >>;

It's cool when people talk mad ***while rockin' sub par gear,
makes them look like pussies. Hey, when was your last pap smear?
You step to me with toe shoes, check that outfit, *** please.
I'm about to Fraps you getting owned, so just /smile and say "cheese."

You come hard, swinging jambiyas, always demand respect.
Speaking of hard, does a Galka in DNC AF make you erect?
King of this rap game? Nah, you wear an Opo Crown.
After this evisceration, you're gonna need a phoenix down.

Stutter step was right, with emphasis on the stutter.
Rhymes got you swayin' in a daze, melting you like Selbina butter.
Exploded all over yourself, you bomb tossin' goblin.
You're better served hiding in a cave like Osama Bin Ladin.

It's been fun, son. I'm logging off, 30 seconds and I'm out.
You got burned like you stuck your hand in an Ifrit's Cauldron flame spout.
Rank 10 in poetics as the flow above displays.
Leave rapping to professionals until they give DNC reraise.

DD check, debuff and healing too
anything you spit i do it better than you
Your HPs going down, I think you need a cure
Light of Penance, TPs gone, you're gonna die for sure

You think /nin will save you?
you think your flourish is violent?
Look here, Chaotic Eye.
Try casting when you're silent.

Chain Affinity, Efflux, Quad Continuum
One shot and you're dead.
You still alive? Not for long.
I'll drop a Disseverment on your head.

Now tab out of windower
and go watch the windows clock
Cause how you gonna battle
when Head Butt's got you on stun-lock.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, what's up with all the smack?
Yea you can debuff, yea you can attack,
But when it comes to healin' you can't sell nothin on the track
Don't get me wrong, red mage is pretty cool
But White Mage is the ul-ti-mate curing tool

SAM can go hard, like a goddamn rock,
but wait, just two shots and you're outta the flock
What's that? You' at two hundred outta' twelve?
Let me Cure five just to save yo'selve
Oh you're upset? Let's take it to brenner
Repose-Holy-Banish 3 and I'm eatin you fo' dinner

I can see you both in a day from now
Whining-crying, "Help R3 PlZ!"
Haha, who's your motha ***' daddy now?

even though lilica is in full perle, i do believe he/she is owning this up lol

Who the hell is the fool, and what he be sippin,
You need to stop trippin, it's time for yo double dippin.

I know your upset but no need to be cross,
My Samurai don't answer to you, you know I'm the BOSS.
I store-tp on my Samurai, like it's going out of style,
Keep swingin to 100tp Jr, I'll add you to the pile.
Samurai is SE's favorite class, go ahead and be sour,
I would be pissed too, if I was forced to wear a flower.

Your gear is so wack people point and they shun,
Have you seen my Samurai noobie? I only rock +1's.
I'll put you in your place. time after time,
You will never be like me, people say I'm a dime.
You should go level a mage class sell your gear and buy staff,
Better yet, get me a pen Jr and I'll give you my autograph.

You had fun with the mic with your rhymes and your quips,
But you cant handle me son cause I'm too legit to quit.
You're Waltzes and your Sambas will only get you so far,
Samurai is the only job that matters, even if you had a Twashtar.

If you want to continue I will always be here,
I enjoy destroying scubs, even a dancing ***.

*drops mic*

A White Mage?! That's rich. Yo, that ain't where it's at.
You're just jealous of my Pimp with your cute condom hat.
Hoist the anchor, I'm about to set sail.
"Look at me, I can double D wearing Reverend Mail!"

Your job is a joke.
Refresh 1 just broke.
Convert should be reserved for us tougher folk.

I'll admit, R1 sucks. You got me there, playah.
But without Refresh 2, your MP's a failure.
Sure, you can launch Banish 3 like a goon.
***son, my Water 4 hits like a typhoon.

My cures are faster; much more unfettered.
Deal with it kid, Red Mages are better.
You've proven my point. Your Red's 2 levels higher.
That's nothing but more fuel to add to the fire.

I do believe your White Mage just got burned
The era of the Reds has finally returned.

WAZZAAAP?!

Geeze guys, I thought this was supposed to be fun,
Now what the heck are you doin makin' all the competition run?
Take any job you want, shoot it to hell,
Don't you know, you should play how you want, and you'll be ringin yo' bell.

I've sampled them all, from Thief to Black Mage,
Would do yourself some good to hold off all that rage.
An open mind is really all you need, one job at a time,
Take them all to max level, and that would be just fine.

But I guess we all know this may never end,
Trying to best each other around every bend.
But what I speak is the true, I have no reason to lie,
We all know we're all eventually going to die.

A mage can't always save you, not matter how hard they try,
Might as well admit defeat and kiss your butt goodbye.
I'm not saying I'm the best, oh no, I'm nowhere near,
I'll just be sitting idly by, watching you all be devoured by Fafnir.

You've gotta be playin, step in Brenner riiiiight,
Meditate, Tachi: Kaiten, look at you now... good night!
I know you want to sound hard, like you a rebel,
But don't be mistakin you ain't on my level.
Stop sitting on mp you lazy white mage and get hastin!
I'm about to slice ***up like Yan-Can-Cook with a slab of bacon.

I hear you already, "Gather together start buffin",
Just remember without me, you will always be nothin.
You think you look good with your red and your white,
Keep me alive and shutup, we'll be the last up, after fight.

You can't just step into the ring, and think you can front a,
You must have Selbina wax in those ears, cause I'm the number one stunna!

Where to start, where to start
Oh yea, your ship never really did depart
What is this, what is this?
Oh yea, I'm really jealous of ya pimp
Because he's makin mils from the dudes you blow,
Come on man, you ain't puttin up much a' show

Did I say I'm wearing a Reverend Mail?
Oh wait, I just noticed that ya rap fails,
you gotta make ***up just to make ya self look good
when all you can do is worship where a white mage once stood

If my job's a joke then your job's a joker,
dance for the king and queen and hope they don't smoke ya'
Refresh 1 is broke, oh really?
I guess that's why I sub scholar till infinity,
Shoutout to my subjob scholah you'z a true playa,
I'd like to see a red mage sleep a soulflaya!

Oh yea, what's this about water 4?
Sorry, but black mage called and said that ya damage's poor!
Fast cast may as well be a fast flash
Two cure 4's and you make a mad dash
Nidhogg on yo' red ***, sayin:
"WHO'S THAT DUMB *** WHO CASTED CURE 4?!
GET SOME GODDAMN ENMITY DOWN GEAR BEFORE I DROP YA TO THE FLOOR!"
Even Nidhogg know's that red mages can't cure bomb,
grabbin hate like dude's grabbin what's left of ya mom's -
Virginity, gonna lose it when ya get raped
shoulda let the white mage cure but now I guess it's too late!

Yea my red mage is 2 levels higher,
but it's that way so i can show people my whm is flier,
Red mages stick to tryin to be a black mage,
or like you're tryna do, and dream to be a white mage.
Bi-polar, which one do I choose?
Can't make up my mind, just gotta face that i'll never be as good
Can I get a holla to those who know what i'm sayin?
Super Saiyan, all up on yo' *** I know what you're cravin,
You're dreamin of being what never was created-
Dreamin of being better than white mage,
betta than black mage, a new age-
or a era of Red mage will never come,
SE called from back in two thousand-one,
they wan't their uber red mage back-
until they toss it like they shoulda done.

Pffft, hell if you'll win a fight
All I gotta do is flash and, oh, well "... good night!"
Zanshin right? But what does it matter?
Stick slow-paralyze-repose on you'll be a ball waitin for tha batta!
Do I want to sound hard, nah, I know I DO,
White Mage step in the buildin, dominate, what it do?

All this talk about how I need to cure, haste, and protect you
***man, if it weren't for me you'd be stuck at level twenty-two

Haste you? please, I'd rather haste the black mage,
with the 'tude you *** got you gonna make the whole party rage-
Grab hate off the Paladin,
set your hp to zero then-
whatchu gonna do?
blame the white mage and scream "I HATE YOU!"
when really, you should've just listened to what your moogle said:
"Smart samurais know not to grab hate off the paladin"

Haha, who ya kiddin-numba one stunna right?
SAM or PUP, I'd rather give the pup the last party invite.

Why don't you hop off that fence and pick a side
but first pick up a tube of some astro-glide

It'll help my words ease in better
when I say that Rdm is the go-getter

I'll get ***by myself and not out lotted by ho's
Waving to the melee on the sidelines while I fight the foes

I'll even toss you the ***that doesn't matter
now /bow motion /kneel motion, continue to flatter

Rdm for life, gettin ***for melees one at a time
back to abyssea, I'm done with this rhyme-



Posting in an epic thread :D
edit: forgot quote x.x

Why you gatta act like you somethin?
With atma's now you got to be frontin.
You need to understand, you a cure *** and nothing more,
You can't hang with the big dogs so just stay on the porch.

You ain't worth the spit on your bell bottoms you nub light weight,
The difference between you and me is I don't hesitate.
I make this game look good, now play your roll and heal,
Or else I'll invite that rdm who makes you cry and kneel.

This is 2010 playa, you better back up and hush,
I'm tired of wasting my time with a whm, with no yagrush.

What the hell is up with all of this noise?
I try to get some sleep and y'all forgot you're just boys.
Well I guess it really is true what the legends all say,
When the Dawg is asleep the pussies come out to play.

Oh Sydney looks like you dropped the mic dude,
No problem my friend let me pick it up for you.
Oh man the smell of this thing fills my head up with maybes,
Looks like you spit on the mic, and like you been swallowing babies.

Now on to Judaine there ain't much I can say,
Mad props to the WHM for raising me back in the day.
Buuuuut on the other hand you came here and tried to rock it,
Your emo *** needs to learn this is the wrong kinda Hot Topic.

Now these other three stooges, I'll just feed you to Jormy,
and that takes care of Abeo, Aleya, and Blackstormy.
Magnuss you are back for another taste of the pain?
Man I kick your *** so much I'm getting Exp Chains.

Katsu you came into a warzone preachin peace and love,
So for now I'll exclude you from the *** kicking above.
Sorry I had to get this derailed train back on track,
With my rhymes so fresh you thought I was subbin' black.

Now if you suckas will excuse me I'm gunna go get some lunch,
and if you come steppin again the last thing you'll hear is FALCON-

Pick a side you say?
Sorry that's just not how I play.
Don't mean to disappoint, but that's just how I am,
Try to have fun playin' this old game, any way I can.

I would take a side, before I learned the truth,
Rather than be one sided at the ole job booth.
I once had a sole job I loved, played it no end,
But you must realize, I had others I wanted to play, can't you understand?

The true meaning of what this game is, if I must ask this,
For to be whole is to be versatile, can't you feel that bliss?
But forgive me if I'm wrong, in your eyes,
Or do I have to smack you with a few melon pies?

I lol'd.
I *** love everyone in this thread <.<

Dear mister rapping samurai,

Tachi: Fudo > Kaiten

Sincerely yours,

This Guy

These rap rebuttals would be more impressive if the time stamps in between them weren't almost an hour apart. anyone can sit there for 45 minutes thinking of stuff that rhymes.










incoming rate downs.